Snick the Tooth Fairy
Other tooth fairies are pretty
They're all glitter and star wands and toole.
With names like Esmeralda and Rosebud
And Daisy and Betsy and Jewel.
Our family fairy has tattoos
He's smelly and ugly and brash
There's more hair inside of his armpits
Than his head, which is covered in rash.
Old Snick didn't wait 'til teeth fell out
He brought 'round his pincers and pliars
He looked in kids' windows to spot 'em
And concentrated 'specially on criers.
One time I wanted to stay up
And ask what he did with the teeth
But he brought an old hammer and chainsaw
So I jumped under cover beneath
I never hid teeth under pillows
It guaranteed very bad dreams
'Cause then Snick would likely be waiting
'Stead of money, that loser left screams.
'Stead of dimes and nickels and quarters
He left broken bottles 'n old trout
So we did everything we could think of
To keep our teeth glued in our mouth.
©
2014 by H. Linn Murphy
And here's a limerick about Snick:
There was a tooth fairy named Snick
Who carried 'round plyers and pick
He scared kid so bad
They ran crying to Dad
And begged for barred windows quick
© 2014 by H. Linn Murphy
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