I hate influenza like crazy.
Don't care if it lets me be lazy.
I feel like my head
Has been battered with lead,
And my eyesight is definitely hazy.
I was absent when flu was invented;
Instead I made lilacs so scented.
I'd hunt down those guys
Who made flu and house flies,
Make certain their heads were all dented.
There is only one thing not to rue:
That barfing causes weight loss in you.
Doesn't happen with me,
So flu's worthless you see.
Nothing stops me from hating the flu.
(I was going to add a cartoon of my own drawing, but I feel wretched. It would have been really cute, though. Maybe when I can think my way past all this slug slime in my head, I will.)